Emotional Body Integration
Have you ever noticed how often we find ourselves repeating patterns in life? Over and over the same things — the same dynamics, the same basic scenarios, the same kinds of interactions — occur. Sometimes, until it seems we are just “Groundhog Daying” our way through life, banging our heads against the same experiences.
We seek to avoid. We look to get out from under. We try to create something else. But the same feelings show up again. The same relationships show up again. The same trauma and the same habits of being return. Again and again.
And we get stuck in a cycle of resistance and persistence. We fight it off. It comes back. We fight it off. It comes back. Until every move we make to push away is expertly used against us to drag us further in.
But underneath the friction; in between the battles; behind the persistence — life is reaching lovingly toward us. Beckoning us. Repeating its welcoming refrain like tides pulling at the shore.
It’s calling to us. That pain. That trauma. That suffering. That anxiety. That fear. It’s trying to reach us to give us its gifts. We block our ears, cover our eyes, and hold ourselves at bay, because…
Well, because of *everything*. Because we were taught to… Because we don’t know… Because we’re afraid… Because we want to feel good. Because that’s what one does.
But if and when we’re brave enough, or desperate enough, or crazy enough, or full enough of love — we can stop running. We can quit hiding. We can cease fighting.
If and when we embrace our fear; if and when we hold our suffering; if and when we accept our trauma; or welcome our repeating patterns, dynamics, or scenarios — if and when we stand in ourselves receiving that which we have called, and brought, and been given, then (and yes, “only then”) can we take, and integrate, and use the boons they were meant to bestow.
Inside the unuttered question of the pattern is the answer we have sought. All the times we tried to resist — to not feel that, to not do that, to not think that — we have wrestled the question, without waiting for the answer to give itself to us. When we hold the question lovingly — and stay with the feeling of the feeling, stay with the emotion of the pattern — the answer lights down on us with wings full of wisdom.
Every painful feeling we repeat is coming from some origin, some place where we first fled that feeling. It returns to us to give us the chance to re-integrate it with our emotional body, to be whole once more. It returns to us to untangle the pattern we’ve built around it. It comes home to roost so that we may give it rest.
I know I’ve been neglectful of some of my less comfortable feelings. I know I’ve held myself back from integrating some of my own suffering. I know my past patterns have held me in painful trauma loops, re-experiencing and re-creating my past suffering.
What about you? Is there a feeling, or pattern, or dynamic that you find repeating in your life? Are you ready to receive the message(s) it is so relentlessly attempting to give you? Do you feel brave enough to welcome your pain home, and give it rest, so that it can set you free?
We’ll spend a couple hours in deep resonance together. I’ll help you feel into the emotion of the pattern, to explore its textures, to trace it back to its origin, and to integrate it with your whole, healthy being. You’ll find yourself freer, brighter, and more complete. You’ll also find those old patterns and emotional pains sliding away, and making room from novel ways of being your biggest and most powerful self.
If you feel like you’re ready, if you feel like this offering might be right for you, then please allow me to invite you to message me (either via my contact page, here, or at nmmctague.cpcc@gmail) to discuss your situation and schedule your session now!